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November 6th, 2007
11:12 pm - Michael Ann
So I am at this work place...It's kinda lame, and kinda almost midnight...you know what that means....ALMOST TIME TO FINISH MOVING MY SHIT OUT OF THAT OTHER APARTMENT.
Daaaamn son, I cannot wait to go to sleep tonight.
Fooor shore.
BLAHHHHH
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October 26th, 2007
06:11 am - There was a time when everything we did seemed 2nd nature.
I am in the best mood ever. I am fully moved into the apartment with Kelli, Dani, Scott, and Dani's cousin. It is nice here, I can do whatever I want, And The people are nice. A little crazy, But so am I. I am sitting in my room smoking, Painting, And listening to Alkaline trio. I FUCKING LOVE IT.
I mean I miss my mom a lot, And I know she is SO sad that I moved out, Especially becasue it was about 2 weeks after Stephen. But as soon as I start driving I will see her as much I possibly can. I think it'll be good for us. Just meeting up random times during the week, and having lunch or whatever. She has helped SO much in this moving process. I am very gratful for her, I love her a lot. Writing all this made me call her so I did. She was worried something was wrong. I ate 2 aderol at like 12. And I have been So speedy. But I am being productive, So it's all good.
Life is pretty good, I am having a lot of fun. I am out of the house, I just need to get my license, Because I suck at that. And failed 2 times already. I will get them next time. And I need to get a job. Real quick, I have to start paying rent and bills soon. That's kinda exciting. My friends are amazing, I talked to Amber for about 3 hours tonight online. IT was good. I was typing like a mile a minute.
I am really enjoying this. I am so going to feel like shit tomorrow. I was hoping to see JOhn today, But he said he doesn't have money to come here, So I think he is riding here with Mike tomorrow. I can only hope. I miss him SO fucking much, And I love him so much more. I am kinda falling in love with him. I mean I bitch about him a lot a lot, But he has his own life, And so should I. This is just something completely different for me. I have never been in a real relationship. It kinda sucks my first has to be long distance. I talked to hiim for a little bit earliar, And I got really mad at him becuase he couldn;t come here today, So I got off the phone all pissed off. Then I traied calling him like 5 times, and he didn'tanswer. So I left him like 2 mean mean messages, Then I sent him a mean myspace message, I feel REALLY bad, And kinda like an asshole. He finally called me back at like 2 and told me his phone fell out of his pocket in the car, And he didn't know. He gives me a lot of excuses, BUt they could be true...Who knows.
I FUCKING LOVE LIFE.
I am in the best mood, But my back hurts a lot.
DAMN, I love this picture...He looks so hot.
<3
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October 23rd, 2007
01:08 am - Hmm
Here's the thing, I moved out today, I am now living with Kelli, Dani, Scott, and Danis cousin. Wierd kinda. But I am super excited. We have an adorable puppy. And some kities. I should be sleeping right now, I have to go to court in like 5 hours....Blah. Hopefully they throw out the ticket and I don't have to pay it. fuck that shit. I love love love my boyfriend, Not thinking that he is cheating is a lot easier than worrying all the time. I like him alot, Hopefully I see him this weekend. I wish he lived in columbus. I would be SO happy. I realllly like sex. I think that's what it is. I am so hot right now, Blahhhhh.
I don't think anyone that lives in Megans apartment likes me that much, And I think it's because of Glenn. I don't really care though. I did nothing wrong to anyone. People are just acting really distant. It kinda sucks. Whatever though...Right?
That's the attitude I should have towards a lot of things. Fuck it.
I seriously need to get a job soon. Fo rill. This sucks a lot not having money. And I need to pass my fucking driving test. Wow I suck at that. I don't know if it's just that I am nervous, Or I really suck at driving? Who knows dood.
Time for bed.
Night.
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August 27th, 2007
02:20 pm - =]
I am happy with my life.
I am talking to my mom about loans and getting my liscence in a few weeks.
John is amazing. I told him I love him. And he said he loves me too. He makes me happy. I am working now at Meijer Gas station. It sucks, But it's a job. I need a car soon. that's what the loan is for.
I havn't been this happy with a boy since Glenn when we first got together. It feels nice.
there was always walls between us.
Alexisonfire.
Good.
<3
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August 6th, 2007
11:11 pm - Modern Romance
hmm, So things have been amazing lately, Minus the no job part.
I met this boy named John. He is amazing. He used to go to CCAD, He went for a year, But now he is going to Aveda brown for cosmotology. He isn't all flamboyant though. I like him a lot. he came and stayed with me last thursday, And it was fantastic, We hung out with megan Klise, And played at a park. Then on Friday we woke up, And layed in bed for a while. It was getting late so we went and hung out with His friend Mark. He was nice, And funny. I like him. At like 5:30 we headed back to johns house. He lives in Olmstead falls. It's so nice there, We went to his house, And played. A lot. And yeah. Ha, We hung out with 2 more of his friends, Jane and Mike. I like them too. The whole time his parents werent home, so we could do whatever we pleased. He took me to the beach, And some parks, IT WAS SO CUTE! and we danced listening to Paul Van Dyke, And The Yeah Yeah Yeahs. It was AMAZING. He cooked me dinner. And we just hung out all weekend. It was like a little vacation with someone you like.
SWEEET!!!
He has 2 jobs, and is about to go to school. I have NO idea why he likes me. I suck. Buuut he does and I am happy about that.
I need a job
Real quick.
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July 28th, 2007
03:23 pm - So this one time..
I like this boy I think...
Not to sure yet.
But he stayed the night with me, And it was ridiculous!
Amazing time!, Let me tell you.
I have a headache, And Robs family is here, I am about to make popcorn and watch a movie.
<333 love love peace peace.
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July 22nd, 2007
04:54 pm - I wondering if it's real life or just another dream...
So I am at Colleens, And she is being a bitch because Me and Serena hung out?
Kinda gay, But whatever. She is so far up her gf's ass...it's kinda annoying.
I like Serena. She's a fun juffalo.
I don't like people anymore. Keke annoys me sometimes, dani is ok. Megan doesn't exist anymore, And Glenn can kill himself. angel sucks sometimes, and Adam doesn't exist either.
That's the sum of my old friends...I like Kelli, Abby and others not listed. Idk, I am very bored. I am talking to this Garret kid. He's cute. We are going on a little date soon. Exciting kinda. I'm also talking to this John guy. He's cute, But just moved to cleveland, So I doubt anything will happen with that. he is staying with me and kelli on thursday.
Blah Blah Blah...
went to a party last night, And to the new Union...it was fun!
i was so drunk.
saw a lot of dick.,
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July 17th, 2007
04:51 am - I'm a mess I guess...
FUCK.
I am bored.
I don't like people anymore.
I hope this one kid moves far the fuck away.
then I could hang out with a lot more people.
I had fun with Kelli this weekend, And Brandon.
Noone cares if you die, They just want you gone...
^^ I like that line a lot.
It applies to Glenn, Adam, And other stupid people.
And I have heard about 6 people say that.
Ha. Fuck me being immature.
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July 1st, 2007
11:11 pm - Now I see who you really are....
I don't ever wanna seem, I don't wanna ever be like you.
I am VERY bored.
Working out tomorrow.
And hopefully everyday after tomorrow.
Cut down on smoking.
Eat healthier.
Drunk more water.
For shore.
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June 27th, 2007
01:19 am - I take with me ever single luxury...
I'll run away with you, By my side.
Well fuck, Let's sum up since the last time I typed in here...well I have been doing nothing, I quit my job at Old Navy last week, That was kinda stupid of me. And I am looking for another job. I have pretty much NO friends what so ever. I have been making new ones. I still have some kind of emotional attatchmen tto Glenn...That's no surprise at all. I knida messed around witht his one guy not to long ago. Don't really see him much anymore. I really don't do shit. Kinda gay. O well I guess? Drama Drama Drama.....I ate acid last saturday, I will NEVER again do drugs...It was fucking horrible SO much shit happend, and I had NO idea how to handle it. We went in the woods and Abby broke Bobbys Finger...Butt we found out that pretty much what happend we could keep our trip from not going bad. That's good to know I guess?
I need to start working soon, So I have something to do with my time. And so I have money to do shit, and get a car...I miss Keke, I liked it when she lived at her moms and she wasn't talking to people except me. I miss angel like hell too. I liked when me and her chilled like everyday. I mean of course I miss Glenn and Megan, But that's a whjole nother story. SOO much emotions with those kids..I think it's just me though. Like they don't feel the same way. I understand though...I guess?
Blah Blah Blah....Whatever. I am talking to this Joey kid. He's a cute nice boy. For shore. I need to find somebody I clique with . LIke BAM!
There's no hope for Sean Michael Bailey.
O well.
I deleted my myspace, I hate that website. Nothing but drama, and shit I don't want to look at.mmhmm.
I am going to bed now. PEACE NIGGA!
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May 29th, 2007
02:26 pm - I luv it.
Once again it's on...
I am bored.
People surprise me more and more everyday.
I give up on humanity.
I'm just tryna get mine.
<3 bye bye
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May 17th, 2007
03:40 pm
Is depressing.....But good.
I love..
mhm!
haha, I got paid today..and My B day is in 2 days.
I am Oh so very excited.
My 2 favorite pictu
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May 14th, 2007
11:50 am - Zing Boom
I had an amazing weekend.
I gots to cuddle with Andy and Phillip.
2 very cute nice 20 something year old boys...haha.
I suck!
It's been fun though.
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May 10th, 2007
02:45 pm - HAHA
Haha, Megan and Glenn..
They're charictors..
they make me laugh.
They have been talking shit all afternoon.
And it makes me laugh.
I have no feelings for those kids anymore.
haha..
I'm going to a party this saturday...It's near Cinncinasty.
I'm very very excited...I'm gonna get with Phillip.
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May 7th, 2007
06:52 pm - Wow.
THIS SUCKS...Everyone of my friends makes me want to fucking puke..I hate them all, Maybe it's just right now becuase I am in a shitty mood.
But FUCK..I can't stand talking to anyone, and I can't stand looking at them, It sucks a lot.
Fuck I can't wait to be out of this place.
Ew ew ew ew ew.
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12:22 pm - You take everything from me.
What a drunken post that last one was..
Haha, I'm cooler than most.
Time to die!
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May 5th, 2007
11:30 am - ew dood
Fuck Hearing glenn fuck around with other boys...
It's awkward..And it sucks a lot.
I went to his apt last night.
It was fun untill then. Well it sucked that He was being an asshole the whole time and bitching a lot.
Buuut shit happens.
Andy is a cool kid. And cute.
He reminds me of Eric a lot.
ha. Shit son. I have o pee, and I am bored.
I hate all of my "Friends" they're no good.
Not all of them. Just most. I hate having a past with most if the people I know. I wish I would've became friends with people that are actually sane.
fuck that shit.
Idk, I am bored and I don't care what I say anymore.
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April 29th, 2007
01:24 am - Um
So I am content with my life and my surroundings...
I mean I have been an emo fatass for a while now.
I am finally over the fact me and Glenn will never love eachother like we used to, the only reason I would act wierd around him was becuase I was jealous. I mean shit, It's hard sometimes. He moved in with Andy and others. That's good, I hope things work out well for him. Um, Tomorrow I am being trained to be a cashier, So that means more hours for me and things. I am happy with my friends and my life. I have been drinking a little bit more than I should, But there is nothing else to do really. Oh WELL!!
This is a random post, Me and Stephen talked a lot on the way home and he is going through the same shit I did, I told him it is not worth it, and he is wasting his life being hung up on some boy.
I don't know, it sucks. 21 more days and I will be legal...I'm excited.
Umm night time, I have to work at 7...EW
I love you Keeks, Abby, Glenn and others...I don't think anyone reads this but Abby though!!
Muah!!!
What a good weekend.
Current Music: ATB Too much rain
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April 28th, 2007
03:23 pm - Haha so last night..
I went to this kegger, And there were 4 kegs..
I got so fucking drunk, and Colleen almost got arrested...For an open container.
It was gayy
then Abby picked me up and we walked around and talked a lot. She made me feel 1,000,000 times better about my life and my losses.
It made me feel good about everything.
I saw this rock, And I wanted to pee on it, an I tried to jump on it, When I got my feet on the rock I realized I was wearing flip flops and REALLY fucking drunk, and I kinda just fell in this mudd puddle, So I was covered in mudd and water..Haha, It was soo fucking funny.
I have to work tonight, This is going to be wierd, I havn't worked anytime after like 5, But I Have to work from 5:15 to 10...
I didn't even know that place was open that late...
DAMN SON.
I am SO content with life right now...I will be 18 in 22 days...I think things will look up for me after that....And It will be amazing.
I have surrounded myself with amazing friends, and I love it.
I have my girls, Then I have the Bf, And the brother....Muah!!!
SHOWER TIME!!!
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April 23rd, 2007
11:30 am - well
Some days
I get crazed
I don't know why they're so irrelevant
I'll take deep breaths
And keep control, and go on.
I've tried brave
And I've tried to save
I've tried to keep it bottled up
I think I've past my prompt and lost my mind and I'm torn.
No telling what tomorrow holds.
Who let, who let this feeling die, when all I did was try?
Who let, you let this feeling die, I can't get you out of my head, my head.
Your the flame that burns me so i know that I'm still alive.
Some say
It's all fate
but I say we control our lives
but if my destiny should out best me, i'll be fine.
I make believe thrill and apathy co-exist in me fairly equally
The truth is, doubts are all I've got to call mine
There's no telling what tomorrow holds.
There's no telling what voice takes control.
Who let, who let this feeling die, when all I did was try?
Who let, you let this feeling die, I can't get you out of my head, my head.
And your the flame that burns me so i know that I'm still alive.
Is there anybody out there (anybody out there)
Is there anybody calling (anybody calling)
Woaahh, what if what I say is really wrong?
Is there anybody out there (anbody out there)
Is there anybody calling (anybody calling)
Woooah, what if waht I say is really wrong?
I'm not in control, things are out of control.
Who let, who let this feeling die, when all I did was try?
Who let, you let this feeling die, I can't get you out of my head, my head.
And your the flame that burns me so i know that I'm still alive.
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